The weird girl and the sea.

I recently read in a book called "The Trust" that if it is love at first sight, you should run in the other direction, as fast as you can. But that is not true in my case of falling in love with Goa! Goa has a piece of my heart. You must be thinking hmm Goa is a pretty good place! The beach, cheap booze, extreme chill, I get it how one could want to go there but love? Isn't that a bit too much?

Well, let me give you guys some context. For me, Goa is my second home. It is where I have spent four wonderful, blissful and adventurous years. I did my engineering from BITS Pilani Goa and over the course of those four years, I fell in love with the place. The brightly colored houses, the air which almost smells like the ocean and even the incessant rains. For the world it might be a place to chill, party, get drunk and basically have a blast, for me its home. It would be safe to assume I have a Horcrux hidden somewhere in Goa.

I know Goa so pretty well, and it knows me too. (Not bragging but I am better than google maps to navigate the Anjuna area). Honestly, I know all of it. And I think it does too. The waters there know me too. Again, I am or was not stoned. You might think I am stupid or was stoned but not the case. I recently went to Goa with a few friends back from college. Spent the weekend. The most relaxed I have been in a very long time. I felt like myself after a really long time. We went to our favorite places, the old beaches, saw the people. There was this shack called Johns near our college we used to frequent. Went there, met John, he was so happy to see us! Went back to college, tried to relive 4 years worth of memories in 40 minutes. It was amazing.



On my last night, I took a walk by myself along the beach and it seemed like I managed to have an entire conversation with the sea at Bogmalo beach. I just stood there on the beach and let my feet get wet, stared at the tiny lights in the sea and enjoyed the sound of the waves. And suddenly I started crying and I couldn't stop. I have been holding it together for a long time now. And it does get tiring, making that conscious effort every single day. And you know, I have been looking for a hug. A hug where I can just let myself go, even for a minute and it would all be okay. At that moment someone else would take my burden from me. And standing there with wet feet, I broke down. I like to think, "I have been looking for a hug, and the sea broke me down". It's as if it knew. It held me, and in that moment I just let myself go. And that my friends, was bliss. Believe me, I wasn't high! :D

Of course a few minutes later, we played kabbadi (Like Shahrukh does in Dear Zindagi) and we said goodbye only to meet again next year! What I realized was that sometimes our memories are strong enough to hold us when we ourselves can't. The weird girl and the sea. My happy place.



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