The uncomfortable truth: How can things not change?
Whenever a big change occurs in our lives or the lives of our close ones, we feel uncomfortable. We anticipate a change in the as-is state of things and the uncertainty of how things will work out contributes to this feeling, which is honestly quite normal. I mean no one likes changes, okay let me change that, most people don't like change. Change threatens comfort.
When an event, that has the potential or the element of change, occurs people get busy trying to brace themselves and then the people around them who might be in the area of effect zone.
At some point or the other, the conversation turns to a point where one person ends up saying, this will not change things between us, rather proclaiming that things should not change.
While I appreciate the sentiment, this seems a bit impractical. Whenever a change is occurring in our lives, be it personal, social, or professional, things will change, things have to change and things should change. We need to accommodate the change and make a place for the new thing in our lives. It is going to need more time and attention, maybe more than your existing responsibilities and commitment. Not giving it the required time will be unfair and unjust. So yes things will change, definitely. It is now about resisting change but learning to steer through it. It is difficult and anxiety-inducing, but without it, life will fall into monotony.
Rather than spending our energy trying to maintain the status quo, we should spend our energy making sure all the pieces fit in our lives. We might need to move a few pieces around, and might even have to discard some if we can't find the space. And it is alright. Not everything and everyone is meant to be with you forever. Some things and some people come into your life for a short time or a specific purpose and it is okay to let them go if they don't fit anymore. This is a recent revelation of mine as well. If we remain stuck to the idea of things staying as it is, it might cause us more harm than good. I realize that change is hard for everyone, but that is the way of life. Not want to sound too cliche, but change is the only constant and turbulence in life's way of keeping things fresh.
So the next time you or someone close is going through a change, give them space to figure things out. The more you struggle to try to hold on, the harder is becomes. You just need to be patient with yourself and the people around you and say "Hey, I know things are changing and will be different, but we will find our rhythm, we will find our place."